marriage

You Cannot Tame A Wild Woman

You Cannot Tame A Wild Woman

“You are terrifying and strange and beautiful, something not everyone knows how to love.”

Being a woman who has been deemed by others as “difficult” to love may hold a weight that not many will understand. 
You may have been labeled as the “crazy chic” or  the “Ice Princess”, and perhaps you have even started to believe these titles and accepted them to determine who you are.

 

The Husband I Never Knew

The Husband I Never Knew

We’ve all heard that the first year of marriage is the hardest.  In my opinion, for couples on their second marriage this is even more true.  The second round of marriage, for myself, gave that statement a whole new meaning.  The beginning of my marriage felt much like an ending. I began my post nuptial life in a state of regret, and fight or flight.  I felt like I was going through the motions every day.  I was married to a man who I felt was more distant with me than he had been when stationed halfway around the world while deployed to a combat zone.  “Were we even in love?”  I asked myself that question every single day, and yet every single night we would crack open a bottle of Jack Daniels and drink until some sort of passion or tolerance was ignited.  Doesn’t sound like much of a marriage to me, what do you think?  If you had been around us during this time, or had seen us out with friends, you would have never even known we were married. We were strangers, simply playing house in an unfamiliar world.

An Affair To Remember

An Affair To Remember

We all make mistakes, make bad choices, and miss judgement calls. If we didn’t, how else would we learn and grow? The affair I had with a much older man when I was 21, impacted my life and my perspective on love forever thereafter. It was a judgement call that I am only now speaking about publicly. I aim to be as transparent as possible, and in telling the story of John and I, there is no way around the truth of how we met, fell “in love”, and grew our family. The way in which we began our love story foreshadows the events that followed into our marriage and divorce.

Happily Ever After...Or So I Thought

Happily Ever After...Or So I Thought

After eight very long and traumatic years of marriage, and one week after my divorce was final, I thought it only appropriate to get married again.  Don’t judge me just yet, there will be plenty of time for that later.

Yes, I got married one week after my first divorce was final.  In my defense, we had been legally separated for three years.  I cannot recall why it took us that long to get a divorce.  If I am being honest, we may not have even been able to afford the divorce, or we were just stubborn and not willing to give in to the requests of the other party.  I know for certain that it was not because either of us wanted to or thought we would ever get back together.